American men’s hidden crisis: They need more friends!

Of all people in America, adult, white, heterosexual men have the fewest friends. Moreover, the friendships they have, if they’re with other men, provide less emotional support and involve lower levels of self-disclosure and trust than othertypes of friendships. When men get together, they’re more likely to do stuff than have a conversation. Friendship scholar Geoffrey Greif calls these “shoulder-to-shoulder” friendships, contrasting them to the “face-to-face” friendships that many women enjoy. If a man does have a confidant, three-quarters of the time it’s a woman, and there’s a good chance she’s his wife or girlfriend.

Read more…

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Where Have All the Good Times Gone? Boomers Are Not Happy

Growing up in the 70s my parents and my friends’ parents seemed content and settled with their quotidian lives. To my teenage eyes, their lives seemed dull and predictable, but secure and happy in their own way. They were mostly paired up, had nice homes, traveled, had good jobs until retirement, and then enjoyed generous pensions that would see them to the end of their days. This is not the case for those over fifty today. What I see now are Boomers leading quiet lives of desperation heading into retirement.

Read more at Huffington Post

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Starting soon: New Discussion Groups Forming

adult groupTherapy Group for Men and Women and a Men’s Group in Toronto.

 Men’s Group

Getting started: If there are enough men interested in working together, I’m planning to start a men-only group in January that would meet bi-weekly. If you are interested in joining or want more information, please contact me as soon as possible.

Therapy Group for Men and WomenTherapy Circle:

You are invited to join a bi weekly therapy circle focusing on personal development and authenticity in a group setting.

This is an opportunity to get feedback and learn from a diverse group of like-minded people. We will be focusing on unfinished business, which is defined as the unexpressed feelings that are associated with distinct memories or fantasies. Feelings associated with unfinished business may be resentment, rage, hatred, pain, anxiety, grief, guilt, and abandonment that are not often fully experienced in awareness, linger in the background, and are carried into the present. The preoccupation, anger, and aversion produced by this typically create self-defeating behaviors that limit your choices and create unhealthy patterns in relationships and behaviour. Unfinished business persists until we deal with our denied or alienated feelings.  We will also focus on accountability to the group, setting goals, developing our inner creativity, become more self aware, responsible, choiceful, self-actualizing and nurturing loving, healthy relationships. Our group will create space for you to freely express yourselves and your feelings without judgment.

Step into your powerful and authentic self.
A main goal of the group is to create opportunities for men and women to share, support and connect deeply with others in an atmosphere of safety, trust and camaraderie. This is your chance to explore patterns and beliefs that restrict you to negativity and prevent you from considering or seeing new possibilities or developing healthy choices that will bring balance to your life. The Toronto Therapy Circle is based on gestalt therapy and Co-Active coaching and is facilitated by a very experienced coach Bradley Foster. Group participation includes the sharing of experience, process, reflection, and may include psychodrama.

“…Things used to get me so upset. I no longer worry about things I can’t change. It’s helped me to put my energy to better use.” client, June 2005

What can you expect as a result? Being part of this group can help you in many ways: increase awareness of your own behaviour and your impact on others; assume ownership of your experiences rather than making others responsible for what they are thinking, feeling, or doing; develop skills and acquire values that will allow you to understand and satisfy your needs without violating the rights of others); accept responsibility for your actions and the resulting consequences; move toward internal self-support from expectations for external support; to be able to ask for and accept help from others and to be able to give to others. You will also learn the key elements to setting and meeting your goals.

Format: Our group meets every other Tuesday evening from 7:00 – 9:00 pm, near Casa Loma in Toronto. Anyone is welcome but there is only room for 8 at which point registration will be closed. The group will be closed to new participants after about four sessions, upon agreement with the group.

Registration: Registration for our group is now available and on a first-come-first served basis.

Fee: $40.00 per meeting, incl HST. To register call Bradley Foster at 416 927-7092. Alternately you can reach me at  Fees are to be paid at the beginning of each month or you can pay for all the sessions at once.

” I’m extremely satisfied. This is a great resource.” - client, May 2004

Location: 25 Castle View Ave. at 7:00 – every other Tuesday evening starting in November. 25 Castle View is across Walmer Road from the Casa Loma stables, between the Dupont and St. Clair West subway stations. See map at:

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Bipolar Survivor

You truly have been one of the biggest impacts on my life in the last 10 years.  You do a great job and help many people.

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The Busy Trap

01anxietyimg-tmagArticleThis is a great piece from the Opinionator of The New York Times by Tim Kreider

If you live in America in the 21st century you’ve probably had to listen to a lot of people tell you how busy they are. It’s become the default response when you ask anyone how they’re doing: “Busy!” “So busy.” “Crazy busy.” It is, pretty obviously, a boast disguised as a complaint. And the stock response is a kind of congratulation: “That’s a good problem to have,” or “Better than the opposite.”

Read more…

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It’s Not About The Nail!

I could watch this for hours. It always makes me laugh!

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No matter where you go, there you are!

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The Torture of Insomnia: How to Get a Good Nights Sleep



Getting a good night’s sleep is something many of us enjoy, but there is a growing number of insomniacs and people who do not get enough sleep. My most recent piece in Huffington Post provides some unusual ways to get to sleep, especially for the insomniacs among us.

The Torture of Insomnia: How to Get a Good Nights Sleep | Bradley Foster.

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Some Demons For You

This Tumbler page has some great visualizations of demons that I often tackle during the day. The idea is much the same as Taming Your Gremlin, but I find these monsters so much better drawn…



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Tim Minchin’s Rant

This is an excellent animated rant on science and fads by Tim Minchin. Ten minutes well spent….

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